If you are in a relationship chances are you spend nights dreaming about the day you will be able to feel comfortable in non-lace underwear. You dream about sleeping sideways in your bed rather than on a specific side, scrunched within the boundaries of an invisible line. And of course, it is human nature to spend your single days dreaming about feeling sexy again in lacy underwear and snuggling with someone special at night.
Both lifestyles have their pros and cons but there is one pro of the single life that couples miss more than anything. It’s the excitement of the unknown.
As a couple you generally know what your nights will consist of; a shared meal followed by a deep and meaningful conversation about which episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer has the strongest feminism connotations. Ok, it’s more like a quick meal standing at the kitchen bench followed by an argument because your supposed soul mate is sick of Buffy. Boring.
But when you are single, every moment could be the moment you meet the love of your life and that is exciting. He could drive down the back lane as you hang out your sexy lingerie. Going for a coffee could be the last time you go as a single woman. Buying underwear could be the last time you buy a lacy g-string before you can finally indulge in the comfy granny pants. Every day has that hint of excitement, a whiff of love in the air, and not just from the expensive perfume you invested in to boost your chances of your soul mate sniffing you out.
It’s these romantic possibilities that make single life so exciting. If you live in the city anyway. In the country, it’s very different. You know who you are going to see when you buy your morning coffee. Mr Johnson bragging about shearing a sheep in under 3 minutes. Mrs Rowe racing off to the local paper to submit her letter to the editor, angry about the kangaroos that keep eating her garden. Bob Baileys daughter; the angry lesbian who drinks soy decaf lattes like it’s normal for her kind to drink designer coffees rather than the stereotypical flat white.
Unless you are Jennifer Lopez or Renee Zellweger living in a small town rom com, Truman style, there is unlikely to be a sexy and in-need-of-loving handsome dude moving to town from the city. But then again, you never know.
In the city, there are millions more people you can bump into at any moment. Catching the train, walking the dog, going to the art gallery opening, all hold the same possibilities. Mr right could be around any corner waiting for you to spill your coffee on so you can play out the cutest of meet cues.
Here’s the clincher. If you are Carry Bradshawing it in an Australian city, there are statistically a lot less single men than women for you to accidentally spill your coffee on. The odds are against you. Sydney is in the midst of a man drought with no hint of a relieving rain coming its way.
But if you live in the country there are a lot more single men than single women so the odds are with you. These single men are most likely farmers living out an isolated existence and finding them is hard unless they are on Farmer Wants a Wife. But they are there and they are waiting for you.
Sometimes I miss the adventures and the possibilities single life can bring. But then I think back to how uncomfortable g-strings were and I would hate to waste my expensive city coffee by spilling it on my soul mate. Mostly, I am glad that I’m more Charlotte than Carrie, shoe collection notwithstanding.
So, if you are single in the city make the most of the excitement of the unknown. It’s probably the best you are going to get. And when you are over the uncomfortable underwear and ready to get serious in your quest for true love, head out to the country. A drive off the beaten track will have the same amount of excitement as going to that art gallery opening. Maybe.